Tag: process

Almost There…

ethelgutmann3 Comments
Let Your Mind Run (Thank You Deena), 120cm x 80cm,
brushed oil on canvas 2017-2022

My intention for this text was to write about books and specifically “Let Your Mind Run” by Deena Kastor and Michelle Hamilton, which I found utterly inspiring. The book retraces the story of long-distance runner Deena Kastor, an Olympic medalist and the American female record holder in the marathon (from 2014 to 2022). In this fascinating read, Deena explains how mind and body can work together and combine their forces to reach full potential. Over her extensive career, she developed mental techniques through optimism, gratitude and ‘mindfulness running’, to not only improve her results, but to find balance as an athlete and as a human being. Her book, and the many interviews and videos I watched with her, made a very strong impression on me. So much, that I told myself I’d need to read this book again and again like a good album that I would play over and over. 

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Proost!

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When I was ten, our school held a running race in which I was eager to participate. I knew one girl was unbeatable, but I still had my chances to be on the podium. During the race, I was a solid second and a turn away from the finishing line, I was envisioning the silver medal around my neck. But, while passing behind the last line of trees away from the spectators’ eyes, I felt something abnormal in my back, as if someone was pushing me. I fell flat on the ground and I vividly remember the amount of feet jumping over me, annoyed to be slowed down by a crawling obstacle. I wasted precious seconds trying to get back on my legs. As giving up was not an option, I sprinted to the finish line and managed to arrive fourth — the worst place: good effort, no medal. 

Untitled (Remembering Sunset Runs) woven painting, 27*42 cm, 2022
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Sleep Tight

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Untitled (Insomnias), 2021
oil paint and pastel on paper – 100×70 cm

Last week I had a weird dream: the pizza, that I prepared with love, was burning in the oven, and worse, the tray that it was on was melting too. The whole situation was painful to watch, especially as the smell of the pizza was so very appetizing. I was annoyed with myself for not looking at the timer and letting this mess happen. As I’m writing this down, some more details come back to mind: I remember that I was actually busy helping someone else who left their bake in the oven next to mine. The problem was that this other bake was continuously sliding on its tray and I had to put a lot of effort to balance the moving object. When I was finally free to get back to my pizza, it was just too late. For the context, we did watch “The Great British Bake Off” the night before, but I have a hunch that the dream points out at something deeper…

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Hi 5K!

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(I wish I could say: I have 5K followers! so, please subscribe and share!)

A few days ago on the 5th of November, I ran my first 5K (Hurray!) I have to admit I’m quite proud of myself because for once, I trained patiently with a running app (C25K: From Couch to 5 Km) and never went overboard thinking I’m invincible, I can do more — which would be my style: after all, running thirty minutes is peanuts, right? Except that naturally, I’m more of a sprinter, starting full-on and stopping dead, coughing up my lungs and holding my stomach a few hundred yards later. So my goal was to change my habits and work on my weak point, endurance. Plus, the idea was to get there injury-free and enjoy every run of the trip! I’m definitely on for the 10K next. 

oil pastel on paper, 30*42 cm – 2021
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Freeze, and Continue

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Untitled (Solitude I – Study after Luc Tuymans), 2011 – acrylic on wood, 18*24cm
Would You Like to Hear My Voice (Solitude II), 2020 – acrylic on wood, 18*24cm

Lately, I came back to painting although I hadn’t done so in the last year. Why now? Maybe because of a series of questions I was asked to think about. The most difficult ones for me were: Which dominating emotion is an engine in your creative work? and Which emotions do you normally work from? Though it seems easy for a creator whose every-day activity is to create, to say what prompts and guides the act of creating, I realised later that it ended up being much trickier than I expected.

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There’s Always a First

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I Think I Might Give in If Nothing Stops the Wind, glue and inks, 2019

We’ve all been through something during lockdown. As if we had needed this general stop to have a better look at our lives and ourselves. How do we live?, what do we do with life? Are we happy the way we live? Are we becoming this someone to be proud of, this person I would happily live with?

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